Approaching Women
One of the hardest thing for a guy to do is to approach a girl. I can’t tell you how many miss opportunities I have had. Walking from one class to another, I must see at least 5 to 10 girls that I find attractive and would like to talk to. How many of those girls do you think I approach? You guess it: NONE.
The reason for this is a reason that most guys will never admit to. However, I will admit to it. I don’t approach attractive girls because I am SCARED. There I said it. I am scared and most guys are too. We as males don’t admit to fear because we are expected to be STRONG, not WUSSY. I think the first step to curing our fear of approaching women is to admit that we are scared and we do fear what others think of us. By admitting our fear and acknowledging that it is a natural part of human behavior, we can then analyze why this fear is present and how we can overcome it.
So I would like to start by giving you a personal example. A few years ago when I was still in high school, I remember walking to one of my classes after lunch. It was a sunny, beautiful Friday and I saw this gorgeous brunette sitting under a tree reading her book. I was about 50 feet away and I was tempted to approach her and start a conversation. However, I hesitated and immediately sat down on a bench and started debating in my head whether I should make the approach or not. After about 5 minutes of contemplation, I had a conversation all prepared in my mind and was ready to make the approach. As I started walking towards her, I was sweating balls from my face. My hands started slightly trembling and I could feel that butterfly tightness in my stomach. Every step towards her felt like I had a boulder tied to each leg. From a third person’s perspective I must have looked like a constipated duck waddling to where I had to drop a load. Everything just felt so unnatural.
As I started getting closer to her, she looked up from her book and looked at me. I looked back at her and in that moment when we made eye contact, something in my head told me to walk away. Instead of fighting against that little voice that told me NO, I succumbed to it. I gave her a slight grin and walked away as if I never intended on approaching her in the first place. Now that is what I call WUSS behavior. As I walked away, I remember being angry at myself and frustrated that once again, I missed another opportunity.
Now this is a very good example of something I did that exemplifies wussy behavior. I have analyzed this situation over and over again in my head and this is what I learned from it:
- Lesson 1
- Lesson 2
The reason for this is a reason that most guys will never admit to. However, I will admit to it. I don’t approach attractive girls because I am SCARED. There I said it. I am scared and most guys are too. We as males don’t admit to fear because we are expected to be STRONG, not WUSSY. I think the first step to curing our fear of approaching women is to admit that we are scared and we do fear what others think of us. By admitting our fear and acknowledging that it is a natural part of human behavior, we can then analyze why this fear is present and how we can overcome it.
So I would like to start by giving you a personal example. A few years ago when I was still in high school, I remember walking to one of my classes after lunch. It was a sunny, beautiful Friday and I saw this gorgeous brunette sitting under a tree reading her book. I was about 50 feet away and I was tempted to approach her and start a conversation. However, I hesitated and immediately sat down on a bench and started debating in my head whether I should make the approach or not. After about 5 minutes of contemplation, I had a conversation all prepared in my mind and was ready to make the approach. As I started walking towards her, I was sweating balls from my face. My hands started slightly trembling and I could feel that butterfly tightness in my stomach. Every step towards her felt like I had a boulder tied to each leg. From a third person’s perspective I must have looked like a constipated duck waddling to where I had to drop a load. Everything just felt so unnatural.
As I started getting closer to her, she looked up from her book and looked at me. I looked back at her and in that moment when we made eye contact, something in my head told me to walk away. Instead of fighting against that little voice that told me NO, I succumbed to it. I gave her a slight grin and walked away as if I never intended on approaching her in the first place. Now that is what I call WUSS behavior. As I walked away, I remember being angry at myself and frustrated that once again, I missed another opportunity.
Now this is a very good example of something I did that exemplifies wussy behavior. I have analyzed this situation over and over again in my head and this is what I learned from it:
- Lesson 1
- Lesson 2
posted by Tinman911 at
8:31 PM
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2 comments
